Wednesday, August 05, 2009
Definitions By Gender
THINGY (thing-ee) n.
Female: Any part under a car's hood.
Male: The strap fastener on a woman's bra.
VULNERABLE (vul-ne-ra-bel) adj.
Female: Fully opening up one's self emotionally to another.
Male: Playing football without a helmet.
COMMUNICATION (ko-myoo-ni-kay-shon) n.
Female: The open sharing of thoughts and feelings with one's partner.
Men: Scrtching out a note before suddenly taking off for a weekend with the boys.
BUTT (but) n.
Female: The body part that every item of clothing manufactured makes "look bigger."
Male: What you slap when someone's scored a touchdown, homerun, or goal and good for mooning.
COMMITMENT (ko-mit-ment) n.
Female: A desire to get married and raise a family.
Male: Not trying to pick up other women while out with one's wife or girlfriend.
ENTERTAINMENT: (en-ter-tayn-ment) n.
Female: A good movie, concert, play or book.
Male: Anything that can be done while drinking.
FLATULENCE (flach-u-lens) n.
Female: An embarrassing by-product fo digestion.
Male: An endless source of entertainment, self-expression and male bonding.
MAKING LOVE (may-king-luv) n.
Female: The greatest expression of intimacy a couple can achieve.
Male: Call it whatever you want just as long as we end up in bed.
REMOTE CONTROL (ri-moht-kon-trohl) n.
Female: A device for changing from one TV channel to another.
Male: A device for scanning through all 75 channels every three minuets.
I'm sure you know others...let's have'em!
The older I get, the more I see how true this all is.
ReplyDeleteYou are a perk this morning.
ReplyDeleteThis is utterly hilarious and oh so true!!!!
ReplyDelete:-D
:-D
:-D
You made my day!
Christine, Female sees this as true.
ReplyDeleteMale see this as a funny joke.
Sarge, that's me, percolating to please.
Mary, you always laugh at my stuff. If I had fans, you would be the president of my fan club. But I don’t have fans…just, mostly, lurkers and stalkers.
Thanks for the laugh this morning!
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteMen are from Mars.
ReplyDeleteRed, 'welcome!
ReplyDeleteBD and women are at the mall.
LOL!!!!!!
ReplyDeleteSUPPER:
ReplyDeletewife: a necessary daily obligation
husband: I'm hungry
It's like magic! he says "I'm hungry" and food appears!
Uhhuh
ReplyDeletewhat a woman says when she's listening
what a man says when he's not
Great additions, ladies.
ReplyDelete