Thoughts To Ponder and a Truism

Judy and I are making the 100 mile trip tonight to see the grand-kids march in the band at the homecoming football game.  Haven’t seen them in almost three weeks…and that is a new record for us.  Man I miss'em.

In the meantime, here are 10 thoughs to ponder and a real truism.

Number 10

Life is sexually transmitted.

Number 9

Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.

Number 8

Men have two emotions: Hunger and Horney.

If you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich.

Number 7

Give a person a fish and you feed him for a day.

Teach a person to use the Internet and they won’t bother you for weeks.

Number 6

Some people are like a Slinky…

Not really good for anything, but you still can’t help but smile when you shove them down the stairs.

Number 5

Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday lying in a hospital dying of nothing.

Number 4

All of us could take a lesson from the weather.

It pays no attention to criticism.

Number 3

Why does a slight tax increase cost you $200, and a substantial tax cut save you $30?

Number 2

In the 60’s, people took acid to make the world weird.

Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.

And the Number 1 Thought

Life is like a jar of Jalapeno peppers;

What you do today might burn your ass tomorrow.

But the truest though is, “Don’t Worry About Old Age; It Doesn’t Last Long.”