Saturday, September 05, 2009

Why

 
1. Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are getting weak?
2. Why do banks charge a fee on “insufficient funds” when they know there is no money in the account?
3. Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?
4. Why doesn’t glue stick to the bottle?
5. Why do they use sterilized needles for death by lethal injection?
6. Why doesn’t Tarzan have a beard?
7. Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him?
8. Why did kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
9. Whose idea was it to put an “S” in the word “lisp”?
10. If people evolved from apes, why are there still apes?
11. Why is it that no matter what color bubble bath you use the bubbles are always white?
12. Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale?
13. Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized?
14. Why do people keep running over a string a dozen times with the vacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down to give the vacuum one more chance?
15. Why is it that no plastic bag will open from the end you first try?
16. How do those dead bugs get into those enclosed light fixtures?
17. When we are in the supermarket and someone rams our ankle with a shopping cart then apologizes for doing so, why do we say, “It’s all right?” Well, it isn’t all right so why don’t we say, “That hurt, you stupid idiot?”
18. Why is it that whenever you attempt to catch something that’s falling off the table you always manage to knock something else over?
19. In winter why do we try to keep the house as warm as it was in summer when we complain about the heat?
20. How come you never hear father-in-law jokes?
21. If a first you don’t succeed, shouldn’t you try it like your wife told you to do it?
22. And obviously if at first you don’t succeed, then don’t take up sky diving.
Posted by Picasa

10 comments:

  1. These are great ponderings!
    Happy Saturday!
    ~AM

    ReplyDelete
  2. I'm here to get myself on your Favorite Blogs list. What do I have to do? ;)

    ReplyDelete
  3. AM, Happy Saturday back atcha.

    Julie, I guess this is your way of calling me.:-) And I see you figured out how to jump on my favorites list, but Lord knows why you would want to open yourself to this stuff. Welcome anyways. But if you can handle Dana I guess you can handle me.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Why do we keep posting things like this?
    Why do we keep reading them when others post them?
    Why do some of us have to write stupid comments about posting like this?
    Why am I even sitting at my computer when I should be out riding my motor cyle on such a nice day?

    ReplyDelete
  5. Dude, if you would get a crackberry you could do both. Text at stop signs and red-light-s while you ride your bike. But I don't suggest you do it while riding.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Why does someone push the elevator button when someone has already pushed it and the button is lit to signal that?

    I have seen an individual who has pushed the elevator button, wait for about fifteen seconds, then go back to it and repeatedly push it several times.

    This does not make the elevator hurry up and arrive. People are entertaining.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?
    Because if he doesn't have a beard, I shouldn't have to shave my legs. I want to know his secret.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Brother Dave, I have to admit it takes much control for me not to push the button, too.

    Wrexie, I think he has no beard becasue his lions like his face when he goes to visti the pride. Can I give a more sutpid answer?

    ReplyDelete
  9. Why do people press the elevator button again after it is already lit?

    ReplyDelete
  10. Ok, I was going to delete my above posted comment but I came up with another WHY.

    "Why do people post comments without reading the others first?"

    Duh! I feel like an a**. I figure you all could have a laugh at my expense :)

    ReplyDelete