Friday Humor for the Weekend

 

A university creative writing class was asked to write a concise essay containing these four elements:
Religion
Royalty
Sex
Mystery

The winning essay read:

“My, God,” said the Queen. “I’m pregnant! I wonder who did it?”

*****

Lost on a rainy night a traveler stumbled across a monastery and requests shelter there. Fortunately, she was just in time for dinner and was treated to the best fish and chips she’d ever had. After dinner she went into the kitchen to thank the chef and was met by two Brothers.

“Hello, I’m Brother Michael and this is Brother Charles.”

“I’m very pleased to meet you. I just wanted to thank you for a wonderful dinner. The fish and chips were the best I’ve ever tasted. Our of curiosity, who cooked what?”

Brother Charles replied, “Well, I’m the fish Friar.”

She turned to the other Brother, “Then you must be…”

“Yes, I’m afraid it’s ture…I’m the chip monk.”

*****

And Finally (I heard those applauses…now cut it out)

Think About This:

Living on Earth is expensive,
But it does include a free trip around the sun every year.

Birthdays are good for you;
The more you have, the longer you live.

How long is a minuet?
It depends on which side of the bathroom door you’re on.

If ignorance is bliss, why aren’t more people happy?

If Wal-Mart is lowering prices every day,
How come nothing is free yet?

You may be only one person in the world,
But you may also be the world to one person.

Some mistakes are too much fun to only make once.

We could learn a lot from crayons:
Some are sharp,
Some are pretty,
Some are dull,
Some have weird names, and
All are different colors…
But they all have to learn to live in the same box.

A truly happy person is one who can enjoy the scenery on a detour.

Happiness comes through doors you didn’t even know you left open.