A guy goes out drinking with his friends one night. His wife's only comment was a request that he be home by midnight, to which he readily agrees.
At 3 A.M. he gets home. No sooner than he gets in the door, the cuckoo clock delivers its 3 cuckoo's. The guy then does his best to mimic 9 more, then cleans up and goes to bed.
When he got into bed his wife said, "Either I must have dreamt it or we need a new clock. I thought I heard the clock cuckoo 3 times, say 'Shit!', cuckoo 3 more times, belch, cuckoo 3 more times, fart and start laughing, cuckoo 3 more times, then say 'Uh-oh...' and throws up."