Wednesday, February 10, 2010

Never Cheat On A Country Woman

A Country wife came home just in time to find her husband in bed with another woman. With super-human strength, borne of fury, and cutting firewood, lifting sacks of feed, and bales of hay, she beat him, dragged him down the stairs, out the back door, and into the barn.

She put his manhood in a vice and then secured it tightly and removed the handle. Next she picked up an old carpenter's saw.

The banged up cheater was terrified, and hollered, "Stop! Stop! You're not gonna cut it off with that rusty saw, are you?"

The wife, with a gleam of revenge in her eye, put the saw in her husband's hand and said....... "Nope.....You are! I'm gonna burn down the Barn!!!”


Matty said...


Mike Golch said...

dangnabbit,ouch,i'm glad that aint me.

ScoMan said...

It reminds me of a song..

"I'm severing the heart line
I'm leaving your corpse behind
Not dead, but soon to be
Though I won't be the one who kills you..

I'll leave that up to you"

Beautiful really. And so close to Valentines day.

Anonymous said...

That is a great, great story!

Golden To Silver Val said...

oh yeaaaahhhh.

Ed Adams said...

I've heard a supposedly "true" story very similar to this.

Only, it was Indians who caught a white man sleeping with an Indian girl from their village. The NAILED his dick to the side of a shed, then set the other side on fire. And left him there to decide.

Coffeypot said...

True or not, Indian or Country, what struck me about this story is...why couldn't he take the saw and cut the table around the vice? Or, when she handed him the saw, why didn't he grab her and hold the saw to her neck? I would not go down without some sort of fight.

Christine said...

I wonder how many men would choose death to losing their little friend?

Miss Em said...

Hey Coffeypot!

When the "little" head is activated how can the "big" head think past the "Oh Yea, Baby" stage in order to get the "little" head out of the deeeep sheee-it that this would represent.

All us inquiring Older than Dirt-tee mind[s] don't need to know but sure are curious.
Miss Em
Austell, Ga.

Paxford said...

Gosh - such a heart warming tale just in time for Valentines day ;)