Thursday, September 01, 2011

Company Mergers















For all of you with any money left, be aware of the next expected mergers so that you can get in on the ground floor and make some BIG bucks. 

Watch for these consolidations in 2011: 

1. Hale Business Systems, Mary Kay Cosmetics, Fuller Brush, and W. R. Grace Co. will merge and become:
Hale, Mary, Fuller, Grace. 

2. Polygram Records, Warner Bros., and Zesta Crackers join forces and become: Poly, Warner Cracker. 

3. 3M will merge with Goodyear and become: MMMGood. 

4. Zippo Manufacturing, Audi Motors, Dofasco, and Dakota Mining will merge and become: ZipAudiDoDa. 

5. FedEx is expected to join its competitor, UPS, and become: FedUP. 

6. Fairchild Electronics and Honeywell Computers will become: Fairwell Honeychild. 

7. Grey Poupon and Docker Pants are expected to become: Poupon Pants. 

8. Knotts Berry Farm and the National Organization of Women will become: Knott NOW! 

9. Victoria’s Secret and Smith & Wesson will merge under the new name: Titty Titty Bang Bang.


9 comments:

Paxford said...

Love them!!!

Would love to get stocks in Hale, Mary, Fuller, Grace - but bet I wouldn't have a prayer!

pax

The Minute Man's Wife said...

LOL! Your comment on my last blog was MMMGood!! I laughed my unmentionables off!!

Mike Golch said...

Fandamntastic.

Lemons Don't Make Lemonade said...

Titty titty bang bang sounds like a winner. lol.

Suz said...

I'd wear anything made by Titty Titty Bang bang!

Coffeypot said...

Pax, now that was funny.

TMMW, yep! Turns me into a stud.

Mike, saw you copied it. Thank you, Sir.

LDML and Suz, especially if you are carrying around a pair of 38s or 44’s.

Momma Fargo said...

LOL. I'm all over the stock market with that info.

Rita said...

Did you hear the one about number 5? UPS Truck and FedEx truck collide in Indianapolis.

Want the punchline?

There isn't one. Happened today.

http://www.wthr.com/story/15382038/accident-closes-i-65-in-clinton-county

It would be funny if it wasn't so bad.

LOLA said...

You don't just think you're funny (like my ex-husband). You really are funny. Wellll, he was kinda funny in bed.

Love,
Lola