Tuesday, September 06, 2011

John's In The Hospital...



















How did I get in the hospital, you ask?

Well, I got home late last night and Judy, my wife, says "Where the hell have you been?" I replied, "I was out getting a tattoo!"

"A tattoo??!!??" She frowned.  "What kind of tattoo did you get?"

"I got a hundred dollar bill on my pecker" I said proudly.

"What the hell were you thinking?" Judy asked, shaking her head in disgust.  "Why on earth would a retired accountant get a hundred dollar bill tattooed on his privates?"

"Well, one, I like to watch my money grow.  Two, once in a while I like to play with my money. Three, I like how money feels in my hand.

And, lastly, instead of you going out shopping, you can stay right here at home and blow a hundred bucks anytime you want."

I’m in the Grady Memorial Hospital, Critical Care Unit, Room 23.

12 comments:

LOLA said...

And you're really in the hospital because . . . ? I don't buy the tattoo on the pecker. I might take it for free, but I don't buy it. And thank you for becoming my follower.

Love,
Lola

Paxford said...

$100 seems a little steep for the market.. just saying :D

Pax

Pamela said...

I know how to fold a 20 dollar bill into a rose

Coffeypot said...

Lola, ya don't have to buy anything, just blow the jundred bucks.

Pax, not when you are paying for the very best.

Pamela, you are so sweet. Do you even know what blowing is?

Maxwell said...

If I remember the documentary "Down Periscope" well, an Admiral in the Navy said, "I need a man with a tattoo on his dick!"

Sounds like you have a standing job offer in the Navy if you wish...

Jim Latchford said...

Me thinks you have over inflated the value of your member. Best keep it under wraps or else Obama will want to get his hands on your money.

Coffeypot said...

Hey, Maxwell. I tried that back in the day. Served my hitch and never got a tat...though I helped a few shipmates get theirs.

GrizzBabe said...

Nice!

Marnie said...

LMAO...hilarious. xo

Momma Fargo said...

Hahaha. Pax's comment made me pee my pants.

I've never imagined you wanted Ben Frank on your wee wee.

CI-Roller Dude said...

you owe me another keyboard...I just spewed coffee all over it again...

Julie said...

OMG, you're killing me.