Monday, December 19, 2011

Witticisms of Ignorance - Or How I Live My Day

















It’s not whether you win or lose,
But how you place the blame.

We have enough youth,
How about a ‘Fountain of Smart.’

The original point and click interface
Was a Smith and Wesson.

A fool and his money
Can throw one hell of a party.

When blonds have more fun
Do they know it?

Learn From Your Parents Mistake
Use Birth Control

Money isn’t everything,
But it keeps the kids in touch.

Don’t drink and drive,
You might hit a bump and spill something.

If at first you don’t succeed,
Then Skydiving isn’t for you.

Reality is only an illusion
That occurs due to lack of alcohol.

We were born, naked, wet and hungry,
Then things got worse.

Red Meat is not bad for you.
Green, fuzzy meat is bad for you.

Ninety nine percent of all lawyers
Give the rest a bad name.

Xerox and Wurlitzer will merge
To produce reproductive organs.

Alabama’s state motto:
At least we aren’t Mississippi

Artificial intelligence is no
Match for natural stupidity.

The latest survey shows that
Three out of four people make
Up 75% of the population.

Congressmen should wear
Uniforms like NASCAR drivers
So we can tell who their corporate sponsors are.

6 comments:

Hillbilly Duhn said...

I knew it. Those damn four people who make the difference! Maybe someday, the population will learn how to count! :)

LOLA said...

I'm afraid these are all too true.

Love,
Lola

Not So Simply Single said...

OMG! I am gonna have to steal these...

Just saying!

Lisa

Chatty Crone said...

Oh my goodness - lots of things to think about - or Ponder-isms!

Sandie

Momma Fargo said...

Haha. Love the politician one...so true.

AirmanMom said...

Money isn't everything, but it keeps the kids in touch... LOL
~AM