Wednesday, September 18, 2013


Q: Should I have a baby after 35?
A: No! 35 children is enough.

Q: I’m two months pregnant now.  When will my baby move?
A: With any luck, right after he/she finishes college.

Q: What is the most reliable method to determine a baby’s sex?
A: Childbirth!

Q: My wife is five months pregnant and so moody that sometimes she’s borderline irrational.
A: So what’s your question?

Q: My childbirth instructor says it’s not pain I’ll feel during labor, but pressure.  Is she right?
A: Yes, in the same way that a tornado might be called an air current.

Q: When is the best time to get an epidural?
A: Right after you find out you’re pregnant.

Q: Is there any reason I have to be in the delivery room while my wife is in labor?
A: Not unless the word “Alimony” means anything to you.

Q: Is there anything I should avoid while recovering from childbirth?
A: Yes, pregnancy.

Q: Do I have t have a baby shower?
A: Not if you change the baby’s diaper very quickly.

Q: Our baby was born last week.  When will my wife begin to feel and act normal again?
A: When the kids are in college.


Irish said...

Love the comic hahhaah!

lotta joy said...

So people NOT on welfare still have kids?

Linda said...

Love the cartoon!

Liz Mays said...

The one about the baby shower got me. ;)

Janie Junebug said...

I love babies. They're new and beautiful and no one has had a chance to mess them up yet. They do it themselves when they poop.


Old NFO said...

Heh, sent this to the daughter that just delivered... :-)

Coffeypot said...

Congrats, Old NFO. I hope she get a chuckle out of them and is this your first grand-bambino?

The Queen said...

Q: I’m two months pregnant now. When will my baby move?
A: With any luck, right after he/she finishes college.

I snorted for sure on that one.

J-Tony said...

I'm still waiting on the wife to feel normal again. Looks like I've got a few more years. College is a ways away. Nice.

Red Shoes said...


Unforunately, this is SO true!!!!