Wednesday, September 18, 2013


Q: Should I have a baby after 35?
A: No! 35 children is enough.

Q: I’m two months pregnant now.  When will my baby move?
A: With any luck, right after he/she finishes college.

Q: What is the most reliable method to determine a baby’s sex?
A: Childbirth!

Q: My wife is five months pregnant and so moody that sometimes she’s borderline irrational.
A: So what’s your question?

Q: My childbirth instructor says it’s not pain I’ll feel during labor, but pressure.  Is she right?
A: Yes, in the same way that a tornado might be called an air current.

Q: When is the best time to get an epidural?
A: Right after you find out you’re pregnant.

Q: Is there any reason I have to be in the delivery room while my wife is in labor?
A: Not unless the word “Alimony” means anything to you.

Q: Is there anything I should avoid while recovering from childbirth?
A: Yes, pregnancy.

Q: Do I have t have a baby shower?
A: Not if you change the baby’s diaper very quickly.

Q: Our baby was born last week.  When will my wife begin to feel and act normal again?
A: When the kids are in college.


John Feralirishman said...

Love the comic hahhaah!

lotta joy said...

So people NOT on welfare still have kids?

Linda said...

Love the cartoon!

Liz @ A Nut in a Nutshell said...

The one about the baby shower got me. ;)

Janie Junebug said...

I love babies. They're new and beautiful and no one has had a chance to mess them up yet. They do it themselves when they poop.


Old NFO said...

Heh, sent this to the daughter that just delivered... :-)

Coffeypot said...

Congrats, Old NFO. I hope she get a chuckle out of them and is this your first grand-bambino?

The Queen said...

Q: I’m two months pregnant now. When will my baby move?
A: With any luck, right after he/she finishes college.

I snorted for sure on that one.

J-Tony said...

I'm still waiting on the wife to feel normal again. Looks like I've got a few more years. College is a ways away. Nice.

Red Shoes said...


Unforunately, this is SO true!!!!