Monday, May 05, 2014

Happy Cinco de Mayo

Today is Cinco De Mayo and many of you will be heading out to some Mexican restraints for some TexMex food and beer.  So to help you in ordering food and understanding what the servers are saying, here is some help… you’re welcome.
The Mexican Dictionary
BODYWASH: I can't go to tha cantina tonite cuz no BODYWASH my kids.

SHOULDER: My tia wanted 2 become a citizen but she didn't know how to read so I SHOULDER.

LITTLE CEASERS: My wife cuts the fabric with LITTLE CEASERS.

COCKATOO: My friend was in the bathroom and I told him to hurry because I had to go COCKATOO!

SODAS: My vieja has beeg tatas and SODAS her sister.

JUICY: Hey vato, I will roll the joint, and ju tell me if JUICY the cops!!!

JUAREZ : My viejita slapped me and I said JUAREZ your damn problem!

TISSUE: Hey vato if you don't know how to do it, let me TISSUE how!

HEATER: My lil sister started to choke...Perro my mom told me to
HEATER in the back!

BRIEF: Hey homes, my lady farted in the car and I couldn't BRIEF!

JULY: Ju tol me ju were going to tha store and JULY to me! Julyer!!!

MUSHROOM: When my familia gets in the car......There's not MUSHROOM left!

CHEESE: I went to dis bar and some vato try to hit up on my vieja. I
said ay vato CHEESE with me!!

TEXAS : My pinche friend always TEXAS me with dumb jokes.

WATER: My vieja gets mad and I don't even know WATER problem is!

HERPES: Me & my ruca order some pizza, I got my piece & she got HERPES.

HORCHATA: You can keep talking your crap, HORCHATA hell up!

FRITO: After arguing with the pinche policia he told me I was FRITO

WAFER: I was ready to go but my wife said to WAFER


lotta joy said...

So, all dees jeers and I've been speaking "Mexican lingo" and din't know?

Coffeypot said...


Jason and Michelle said...

oh my. those are great!

Unknown said...

Just... Damn! That is friggin' hilarious... B-)

Furry Bottoms said...

Brief was my favorite one :)

Momma Fargo said...

***HEAD DESK*** I do like your flashy senor, however.