Wednesday, September 12, 2007

I'm Back and Boy Are You Going To Get It

Okay! I see that you aren’t very good followers of instructions. So you all turn around and bend over for your spanking – especially you GrizzBaby. Just let me get my belt off and...ooops… damn. Wait! Let me pull my pants up. There! Now… damn.

Does anyone know where I can get a pair of suspenders, or anyone who is willing to hold up my pants for me? I mean you have it coming. Okay! I owe you one.

It was a great trip. The weather was beautiful and the traffic was light. I left the house at 9:00 pm and drove all night and most of the morning to get to N.J. Then I drove back to just outside Richmond before I got too sleepy to drive. I got a room and was asleep by 4:00 pm. Got up this morning and was on the road by 9:00 am – after a good Waffle House breakfast.

For you who do not know, I do a little transporting from time to time. I work for a few different car dealerships in the area and I transport cars and trucks for them. Sometimes, if it is to just pick up a car, then another transporter and I will ride together to the dealership and pick up a car/truck and drive both vehicles back to the dealer. If it is just a swap, then I will drive one to the dealer and drive another one back. I have been to just about every state in the Southeast. I do it about one or twice a month. I won’t get rich, but if gives me a little spending money in my retirement.

Also, as some of you know, my step-daughter, Dr. Amber, is a veterinarian who owns and operates a low cost mobile spay and neuter clinic. She travels all over North Georgia to Pet Smarts, humane societies, animal shelters and other places who request her services. She is booked several months in advance, but some of the bookings are repeat customers. On Saturdays she goes to a neighborhood Pet Smart and adopts out dogs and cats – if you meet her strict guidelines to become a pet parent.

She has kennels in her back yard and she tries to save every Goddamn dog and cat she sees. Don’t get me wrong, though. If the pet is beyond saving, she will euthanize the animal, but it had better be pretty damn sick or just too mean to be sent out into the world.

She also works with many animal rescue agencies and is well known throughout the country for her work with animals, and she gets calls from many states looking for animals. When she gets some animals she feels she cannot adopt out but feels they could be adopted somewhere else, she gets on the phone. This week she had five dogs that needed to go to New Jersey to a “no kill” shelter (the only type shelters she will send dogs and cats.) So who does she call? The easiest mark she knows. I don’t charge her for my services, though. She pays for the gas, food and any motel I may need, and that’s okay with me. Since she runs a nonprofit organization, she doesn’t have a lot of cash for trivial things like paying her step-dad for helping her out. Besides, she’s family. So that’s why I was on the road, and why you are all going to get spanked as soon as I can do something with these damn pants.

13 comments:

GrizzBabe said...

What a wonderful friend of animals your step-daughter is! Hope you enjoyed your trip.

Now, where's my spanking?

coffeypot said...

Thank you.

Where's my suspenders?

cooper green said...

Is it Smack Saturday already? Maybe Canadian calendars don't recognize this important event, but the rest of the English-speaking world seems to. Our friend Gorilla Bananas also dedicated most of his latest post to fanny-whacking. I'm missing something here, and it's making me nervous.

Teri said...

I could run to Target and buy some suspenders for you, just let me know.

I don't know, a blog spanking sounds kind of dirty.......heheh

dilling said...

do you transport mice?

her indoors said...

glad you are back safe and sound, ok i ready, willing and waiting........ouch, ouch oh no dont stop please ouch ouch

Heidi the Hick said...

maybe your suspenders are hiding in the same place my glasses disappeared to.

I could be a critter rescuer...if I could give them away. I have to have serious self control to have only one cat and one dog...and two horses...

KLee said...

I'm bending over, but I don't feel any spanking!

So. You're a spanker *and* a flasher, huh? Boy, Marni must get a lot of info from this blog that really messes with her mind. :)

e.Craig said...

Welcome back. Noble work.

coffeypot said...

Cooper, I, personally, don’t go for the spanking stuff. I mean, if you hit me I am going to try my best to knock you teeth out through your ass hole. But if a lady likes a little pooper paddling, I don’t mind obliging. However, if I were in the same room with Maggie Gillenhaal I would be willing to spank myself. But I don’t think you are missing anything.

Teri, Target works. But I think if I got into a little blog spanking, well, I might end up in jail where I would have to sleep on my back for years.

Dilling - Transport mice? Only to that great cheese factory in the sky. Why? Do you need some mice?

Her indoors – Take that you saucy little winch.

Heidi – Sometimes those little critters really get a hold of you and it’s hard to pass them on. But it is for their best that they go to a family who, we hope, treat them with the love and care they need. Occasionally I’ll transport one that I had just as soon chunk out the window going down the highway, but I have to tell myself it will only be a few hours and it will be gone. I have transported a couple of dogs that did not ride in the cages, but laid in my lap the whole trip. (sniff, sniff) I can’t go on.

Klee – Poor Marni has given up on me years ago. I embarrass her more than anything else. But it is fun doing it.

e.craig – Dr. Amber and her assistant, Susan, do the noble work. I just drive.

Pamela said...

now I understand how you were able to stay awake

woof woof woof woof woof...

Beth said...

Uncle Pot, you have a damn good life these days, don't you?

coffeypot said...

Pamela, actually most dogs are very quiet when traveling. When I stop for food or the restroom, they come to life because they think they are about to get out. But once I start again, they quiet down. If there is one with a rep of being "talkative" Dr. Amber gives it a tranquilizer pill so that it will sleep during the trip. Other wise, out the window it goes.

Beth, I guess I do - and it doesn’t involve alcohol, drugs or women. Imagine that!