"WHERE IS MY SUNDAY PAPER?” the irate lady loudly demanded over the phone to the clerk at the newspaper office.
"Madam", said the newspaper employee, "today is Saturday. The Sunday paper is not delivered until tomorrow, on SUNDAY".
There was quite a long pause on the other end of the phone, followed by a ray of recognition as she was heard to mutter, “Well, shit, that explains why no one was at church either.”
I'm glad I'm not getting old like her. I would hate to...uh...give me a minute...uh...what was the question again?