Friday, October 12, 2012

Thoughts To Ponder and a Truism

Judy and I are making the 100 mile trip tonight to see the grand-kids march in the band at the homecoming football game.  Haven’t seen them in almost three weeks…and that is a new record for us.  Man I miss'em.

In the meantime, here are 10 thoughs to ponder and a real truism.

Number 10
Life is sexually transmitted.

Number 9
Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.

Number 8
Men have two emotions: Hunger and Horney.
If you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich.

Number 7
Give a person a fish and you feed him for a day.
Teach a person to use the Internet and they won’t bother you for weeks.

Number 6
Some people are like a Slinky…
Not really good for anything, but you still can’t help but smile when you shove them down the stairs.

Number 5
Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday lying in a hospital dying of nothing.

Number 4
All of us could take a lesson from the weather.
It pays no attention to criticism.

Number 3
Why does a slight tax increase cost you $200, and a substantial tax cut save you $30?

Number 2
In the 60’s, people took acid to make the world weird.
Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.

And the Number 1 Thought
Life is like a jar of Jalapeno peppers;
What you do today might burn your ass tomorrow.

But the truest though is, “Don’t Worry About Old Age; It Doesn’t Last Long.”


LL said...

Real words to live by.

Have a nice trip.

Janie Junebug said...

I like the Slinky idea. I want to push someone down the stairs now. Just some random person.


Anonymous said...

I want a slinky!!

Just Another Father said...

Those are great. Hope you guys had a good time with the grandkids.