Friday, December 25, 2009

Christmas Sucked For Me

Well, all the Christmas stuff should be over by now. So I can tell you why I haven’t posted in a few days. I am sicker than John Kerry on election night.

I didn’t want to say anything for fear of ruining your Christmas. The though of you walking around in circles or from room to room wringing our hands and maybe a few tears running down your cheeks worrying about me and my health stopped me from posting. I’m giving and caring in that way. It’s all about you as far as I am concerned.

On Wednesday I started feeling bad, coughing and stuff. By Thursday morning my eyelids a very merry shad of red and matted shut, and I was coughing like I thought it was fun or something. The wife, at gun point, forced me to go to the urgent care center for my miracle cure. I told her that it would have been better to call Ernest Angley and have him send me a miracle cure prayer cloth, but she cocked the hammer.

I have an upper respiratory and sinus infection that was moving into my eyes. Thus the puss and drainage and stuff. I still participated in the family gathering, but went back to bed as soon as all the loot was passed out. It was fun and I loved having the family around, but I left Judy and the kids and kids in law playing board games on the kitchen table and went to bed.

Still feel like shit, but I am on the North Side Of The Dirt and that is a good thing.

Regardless of my problems, trials and tribulations, I hope you peeps had a great and happy Christmas and Hanukah. I don’t send Kwanza wishes because that is just a made up holiday that means nothing so I ignore it. And I hope you atheist out there enjoyed your materialist holidays, too.

I have been given a couple of awards and I will post them as soon as I feel like sitting here long enough to do it. Thank you, too, for the honor.

Later, peeps!


CI-Roller Dude said...

You need the "cure".

Take a cup of tea, none of the hippy shit green tea or anything like that, but real fucking tea.
Make it to your taste.

drink half of it.

Fill the mug back to the top with Scotch, rum or whatever the fuck you have (Bosnia it was Rockiea)
Then drink it all down and a nice pace.
then stop posting whining sick shit for Christmas, we don't want to be de-fucking-press, we want joy and shit like that. Peace in the world and all to get laid.

Merry Chritsmas,
I was just kidding.

Coffeypot said...

Dude, it touches me that you care so much.(wipping tears from my eyes)

Kanani said...

CI Roller Dude just cracked me up!
Ha ha ha ha~
Sorry you are sick. That really sucks. Sounds like me over Thanksgiving. As it is now, I am in bed laid up with some kind of bronchitis. But yeah, rum helps.

anon said...

I hear ya, Coffey, got another nice abcess, (how the fuck do you spell that?) for Chrismas Eve, my pouring tears and wringing of hands was all about me,but it was there.
Only difference is, my primary care-giver and loving husband, instead of carting me off for emergency care, yelled at me for being inadequately festive this fine holiday season. Apparently, he finds it depressing to see me in pain. The ass.

Its all been just fucking great : D

Oh, and Merry Christmas from the bottom of a bottle of percoset, a huge glass of whisky and with a little luck, another emergency root canal in the next coupla hours.

Er, hope you're feeling better, I sincerely do, sinus infection is bloody awful.

Coffeypot said...

kanani, thank you and I am sorry you are down, too. It seems to be going around in various forms.

PG, darling. I am so sorry you are in pain again. I’m even more sorry of the poor fuckers who have to do the root canal on you - given your loathing of the dental chair.

And for the husband, tell him ‘till his attitude toward you and your ailment changes, your root canal for him will be closed, too.

Your proverbial provider for puritanical pleasure of his proclivities of pleasure will be permanently postponed till his protest ceases to persist.

In short - no sympathy; no sex.

Mary Stebbins Taitt said...

Hope yr feeling MUCH better! Merry Christmas.

Ducky said...

So sorry to hear you have the sick cooties...Merry Christmas friend.

Hope you're feeling better soon....I'm liking the idea Roller Dude has for dolling up my tea....I'm not sick but it still sounds good.

Coffeypot said...

Daffy, you could do yourself a great deal of good in listening to CI-Roller Dude...just be aware he is ARMY/National Guar/Cop trained and influenced, so be careful. He can help you, kill you or arrest you. But if you bat your lashes and shake you money maker, all three of his influences go out the window and he becomes a man. Get anything you want.

Tracie said...

Sorry you're sick. I hope you feel better soon. Ya want me to send you some of my grandma's secret remedy?

(It's pretty similar to that tea and liquor stuff but it sounds more legit. My kids call it "Mom's Nasty Brown Medicine".)

Merry Christmas!

Coffeypot said...

kys, if grandma's rememdy include booze, hell yes. Bring it on.

Paxford said...

*cheers the gun toting wife*

Glad you are on the mend - we can't survive without your calm guidance, southern charm & wit ya know :)


Ed said...

Merry Christmas and I hope you get to feeling better.

Marni said...

Yeah - you looked like SHIT. But i'm glad you are back to feeling somewhat better.

Love you