The Drover and the Croc

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An Australian Drover walks into a bar with a pet crocodile by his side. He puts the crocodile up on the bar and turns to the astonished patrons.

'I'll make you a deal. I'll open this crocodile's mouth and place my manhood inside. Then the croc will then close his mouth for one minute. At that time he'll open his mouth and I'll remove my unit unscathed. In return for witnessing this spectacle, each of you will buy me a drink.'

The crowd murmured their approval.

The man stood up on the bar, dropped his trousers, and placed his Credentials and related parts in the crocodile's open mouth.

The croc closed his mouth as the crowd gasped.

After a minute, the man grabbed a beer bottle and smacked the crocodile really, really hard on the top of its head.

The croc opened his mouth and the man removed his genitals unscathed as promised.

The crowd cheered, and the first of his free drinks was delivered.

The man stood up again and made another offer. 'I'll pay anyone $100 who's willing to give it a try.'

A hush fell over the crowd. After a while, a hand went up in the back of the bar. A blonde woman timidly spoke up..........

'I'll try it - but you have to promise not hit me so hard.’
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Let Me Tell You... and I'm On The Road Again

“Let me tell you about this idiot who called me yesterday. Last year I replaced all the windows in my house with that expensive double-pane energy efficient kind, ya know, and yesterday I get this call from the contractor who installed them.

He was complaining that the work had been completed a whole year ago and I still hadn't paid for them.

Hellloooo,........... just because I'm blonde doesn't mean that I am automatically stupid. So, I told him just what his fast talking sales guy had told me last year, that in ONE YEAR these windows would pay for themselves! Helllooooo? It's been a year! I told him.

There was only silence at the other end of the line, so I finally just hung up.

He never called back. I bet he felt like an idiot.”

That’s it for today, peeps. I have to make a special run to NY with another load of dogs moving into forever homes. This will be the third trip this month. My second and another couple took a load up this past Thursday.

I’ll check in when I can. Maybe Monday night. Caio!

Blond Corn Maze