True Love

If you love something, set it free.
If it comes back, it was, and always will be, yours.

If it never returns, it was never yours to begin with.

If it just sits in your living room,
Messes up your stuff,
Eats your food,
Uses your telephone,
Takes your money,
And never behaves as if you actully set it free
In the first place,
You either married it or gave birth to it.

True Love

An elderly gent was invited to an old friend's home for dinner one evening. He was impressed by the way his buddy preceded every request to his wife with endearing terms such as: Honey, My Love, Darling, Sweetheart, Pumpkin, etc. The couple had been married almost 70 years and, clearly, they were still very much in love.

While the wife was in the kitchen, the man leaned over to his host, "I think it's wonderful that, after all these years, you still call your wife those loving pet names."

The old man hung his head. "I have to tell you the truth," he said, "Her name slipped my mind about 10 years ago, and I'm scared to death to ask the cranky old bitch what it is."