Monday, June 02, 2008

I'm Back

Perhaps you notice I wasn’t around this past week. It was a busy week and I didn’t have access to a computer the whole time. I stared the week off with a trip to the mountains with Sweet Tea and the grandkids. Went for a mountain train ride, tubed down a river, enjoyed a day of rain, then I had to leave on Thursday for a dog trip to New York. On Tuesday, while we were on the train ride, we got a call from our real-estate agent telling us that the sorry pile of infested dog shit people who put a contract on our house had lied about their income, debt to income ration and other shit. In short, we are back to square one. After three months of riding all over North Georgia and finding a great place on nine acres in the small town of Nicholson, we had to cancel that contract, too. BTW, Kenny Rogers is moving to Nicholson, too. I wonder if he will have a double-wide?

Then, to add to the pleasures of my life, I slept late in New Jersey, where I had to pick up a dog to bring back to Georgia. Then I had a three hour wait to go five miles in Washington, DC. The four lane I-95 was cut down to one lane for road construction. I got back to drop off the dog and the empty cages around 10:30 Saturday night. I then took off for the cabin in the mountains, a 50 mile trip down Georgia highway 53. I was using Agnis, my GPS system, to go back. Around 11:45 my ‘Low Gas’ light came on. I knew I had around three gallons left so I took Agnis off the windshield and punched in a location for a gas station. One came on the screen that showed being three and a half miles away. I was told to turn left on a road three miles down the road. The left turn was a dirt road – nothing unusual in the North Georgia Mountains. But this dirt road ran on for over three miles and the GPS ran out of information. I passed old churches, houses and grave yards. So I turned around and went back to the road and turned left again.

This time Agnis told me to turn left onto a road in about a half a mile. This too was a dirt road that went nowhere. So I double back thinking to myself that I was wasting gas and had to find a station opened after midnight soon. Agnis sent me up a third dirt road and I was getting very concerned that I would run out of gas some three miles up a dirt road and some good-ol-boy would come up to my window and tell me, ‘Yo sho to a purty mouth.’ Coincidently, I was listing to The Grand Old Opery on the radio and the set playing was bluegrass music with banjos a wailing. So I drove back to the main road, changed gas station locations on the GPS and then drove to the address, which was a trailer – someone’s home.

I set there thinking I had driven about 15 miles on the hayride of a trip, so I decided to just stay on the main road until I found a station or run out of gas. At least I was on a fairly used hardtop road. After about 5 miles I saw the glow of lights above the trees on my left. I drove another three miles and came to the exact road in Ellajay I need to get back to the cabin and there was a gas station, a Waffle Kind (kind of like a Waffle House) and other stores. I had to cross Highway 5 to get to the station, but had to wait for the light to turn green. When it did, I drove to the station, which was on a hill, and as I turned into the place my engine sputtered and died. I coasted to the pump. I gave a little prayer of thanks to my co-pilot (not that dame slut of a navigator, Agnis.)

The thing that made it so bad was that back in New Jersey, fifteen hours before, I pulled a muscle in my back, just below the shoulder blades loading the dog into a crate and drove all the way home in pain and discomfort. I had to gas up several times on the way back and could hardly bend over to pump the gas, much less climb in and out of the van. I had been on the phone with Sweet Tea on and off the whole time, but I didn’t tell her about my back until after I got gas at the station in Ellajay. When I got to the cabin, she had a couple of hotdogs and 450 extra strength Tylenol waiting for me (actully it was on four tablets.) I was walking stooped over and she was telling me I should have told her. Why? She worries enough. No need to add to the worry. But I can tell you one thing, though. I was awfully glad to lie down in that bed.

Of course the kids had us up early. Each one came in and set on the bed telling me about their horse back ride with Marni and Carl (who came up while I was gone) and Sweet Tea. J-Man showed me his finger were he got stung by a wasp. I got up in time to help pack the van for the trip home. My back felt fine after the drugs and sleep.

Now I have to read a weeks worth of blogs so I'll talk to ya later.


BerryBird said...

Drugs and sleep will do wonders.

Coffeypot said...

I thought about taking drugs on the drive back but I was afraid they would make me drowsy. I think the pain kept me awake for the sixteen hour drive.

anajz said...

fthis is my first visit to your blog and i must tell you that i had the best time ever! i love your handle, love your writing, and love your humor!
i am sorry about the difficulties with your back.
hope you don't mind if i drop in now and again.


Coffeypot said...

anajz, thank you for you kind words. If you think I'm that funny, you must lead a sheltered life. But I would be honored if you check in as often as you like. I would prefer, though, that you leave a comment when you do. But you may find out that I’m not that funny. I can be as serious as an inflamed hemorrhoid when an occasion calls for it. So be forewarned.

Burfica said...

I think I would have thrown my gps system out the dam window. hehehehe

e.Craig Crawford said...

That's quite a story, Coffeypot. Wore me out just readin' it. Agnis .. what a sorry-ass guide. The name seems to fit, though.

I wondered why it was so peaceful around here last week.

Southern (in)Sanity said...

Sounds like quite a trip. That really sucks about the GPS. Thankfully you found a gas station on your own before it was too late!

Glad to hear your back's doing better too.

GrizzBabe said...

Boy, the gasoline fairies were really looking out for you!

Mary Stebbins Taitt said...

Thanks for the greetings John! I wish you long life, good health and happiness!

I hope you have NO more trouble with your back and I don't like the idea of your driving so far alone and boy what a hassle on those dirt roads and glad you didn't run out of gas a second sooner than you did!

Pamela said...

I've been hoping to get a GPS - but you've given me pause.

I'm going to check out Nicholson on google earth.