Sunday, May 31, 2009

For The Citizen Soldiers

This is actually 3 Doors Down but someone stopped the enbeding of their video. The title says Kid Rock, but it's the real 3DD's video. The Kid Rock video "Warrior" (with Dale Earnhart) is below.




I posted this for the Citizen Warriors like CI-Roller Dude who are as tought and brave as the "regular" forces but don't get all the press and respect. They have mine!

Friday, May 29, 2009

I Told You So

I copied this from Sargent Charlie.
 

The sad thing is the Democrats do not realize this. I believe that most Democrats love their country and want a better world. We all do. But the world of Big Government and Government controlled programs, higher taxes and loss of individual and business freedoms will not make it happen. We need to take back the control and give it to the people. The ONLY ones who prosper are the ones in charge in a Socialist (Liberal) society.

I looked this up in Snopes and the validity of the comment is under investigation.
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Wednesday, May 27, 2009

Service Announcement

It is my duty to pass this along to you men out there.
You're Welcome!

Tuesday, May 26, 2009

Till The Last Shots Fired by Trace Atkins

I cannot add anything to this. It speaks for itself.

Sunday, May 24, 2009

Frogmen Are Smart Sailors

 

I was watching an old Navy movie today and there was a scene where these frogmen were on a rubber boat all geared up. They were rechecking their gear, listening to last minute instructions from their leader and waiting on the command to enter the sea. The command was given and each of them fell backwards into the water.

I though about this for a long time. Why did they all fall backward into the sea? Then it dawned on me, if the had fallen forward they would have all fallen to the bottom of the boat.

Smart, these frogmen.
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Friday, May 22, 2009

Memorial Day 2009

 

 

 

It’s not about the parades, folks. It’s not about the picnics and the watermelons and all the speeches.

It’s about the men and women lying in hallowed ground all over the world, laid to rest from the Revolutionary War to today. It is because of these people that we are able to have the parades and picnics and speeches without fear of reprisals. They gave their all and deserve to be remembered.

So enjoy your Memorial Day and the festivities, but keep it in the back of your mind what it is really all about.

Lest We Forget
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Tuesday, May 19, 2009

Tuesday Humor (Of Sorts)

 

Here are some well worn jokes for your Tuesday. Old but good enought to be passed around again.

A filthy rich Florida man decided that he wanted to throw a party and invited all of his buddies and neighbors.

He also invited Leroy, the only Redneck in the neighborhood. He held the party around the pool in the backyard of his mansion.

Leroy was having a good time drinking, dancing, eating shrimp, oysters and BBQ while flirting with all the women.

At the height of the party, the host said, “I have a 10 foot man-eating gator in my pool and I’ll give a million dollars to anyone who has the nerve to jump in.”

The words were barely out of his mouth when there was a loud splash. Everyone turned around and saw Leroy in the pool!

Leroy was fighting the gator and kicking its ass! He was jabbing the gator in the eyes with his thumbs, throwing punches, head butts and choke holds, biting the gator on the tail and flipping it through the air like some kind of Judo Instructor.

The water was churning and splashing everywhere. Both Leroy and the gator were screaming and raising hell.

Finally Leroy strangled the gator and let it float to the top like a dime store goldfish.

Leroy then slowly climbed out of the pool. Everybody was just staring at him in disbelief.

Finally the host says, ‘Well, Leroy, I reckon I owe you a million dollars.”

“No, that’s okay. I don’t want it,” said Leroy.

The rich man said, “Man, I have to give you something. You won the bet. How about half a million bucks, then?”

“No thanks, I don’t want it,” answered Leroy.

The host said, “Come on, I insist on giving you something. That was amazing. How about a new Porsche and a Rolex and some stock options?”

Again Leroy said no.

Confused, the rich man asked, ‘Well, Leroy, then what do you want?”

Leroy said, “I want the name of the Sumbitch who pushed me in the
Pool.”
***

Saudi Arabia held its first beauty pageant over the weekend and already they’re embroiled in their own scandal.

Topless photos of Miss Saudi Arabia have surfaced.

You can see her entire forehead.
***

A crusty old biker out on a long summer ride in the country pulls up to a tavern in the middle of nowhere , parks his bike and walks inside.

As he passes thru the swingin’ doors, he sees a sign hanging over the bar:

COLD BEER: $2.00

HAMBURGER: $2.25

CHEESEBURGER: $2.50

CHICKEN SANDWICH: $3.50

HAND JOB: $50.00

Checking his wallet to be sure he has the necessary payment, the ole’ biker walks up to the bar and beckons to the exceptionally attractive female bartender serving drinks to a couple of sun-wrinkled farmers.

She glides down behind the bar to the ole biker.

“Yes?” she inquires with a wide, knowing smile, “May I help you?”

The ole biker leans over the bar, “I was wondering young lady,” he whispers, “are you the one who gives the hand-jobs?”

She looks into his eyes with that wide smile and purrs “Why yes! Yes, I sure am.”

The ole’ biker leans closer and into her left ear whispers softly, “Well, wash your hands real good, ‘cause I want a cheeseburger.”
***

When a lonely frog consults a fortune-teller, he's told not to worry. "You are going to meet a beautiful young girl," she says, "and she will want to know everything about you."

"That's great!" says the excited frog. "When will I meet her?"

"Next semester," says the psychic, "in biology class."
***

And Finally, A Different Ways Of Looking At Things:

A little boy went up to his father and asked: "Dad, where did my intelligence come from?"

The father replied, "Well, son, you must have got it from your mother, cause I still have mine."
---------------------------------------------------------
"Mr. Clark, I have reviewed this case very carefully," the divorce court Judge said, "and I've decided to give your wife $775 a week."

"That's very fair, your honor," the husband said. "And every now and then I'll try to send her a few bucks myself."
---------------------------------------------------------
A doctor examining a woman who had been rushed to the Emergency Room, took the husband aside, and said, "I don't like the looks of your wife at all."

"Me neither doc," said the husband, "but she's a great cook and really good with the kids."
-----------------------------------
An old man goes to the Wizard to ask him if he can remove a curse he has been living with for the last 40 years.

The Wizard says, "Maybe, but you will have to tell me the exact words that were used to put the curse on you."

The old man says without hesitation, "I now pronounce you man and wife."
-----------------------------------
Two Reasons Why It's So Hard To Solve A Redneck Murder:
1. The DNA all matches.
2. There are no dental records.
-----------------------------------
A blonde calls Delta Airlines and asks, "Can you tell me how long it'll take to fly from San Francisco to New York City?"

The agent replies, "Just a minute."

"Thank you," the blonde says and hangs up.
-----------------------------------
Two Mexican detectives were investigating the murder of Juan Gonzalez.
"How was he killed?" asked one detective.

"With a golf gun," the other detective replied.

"A golf gun! What is a golf gun?"

"I don't know. But it sure made a hole in Juan." (Okay, I hear the moaning)
-----------------------------------
Moe: "My wife got me to believe in religion."

Joe: "Really?"

Moe: "Yeah. Until I married her I didn't believe in Hell."
-----------------------------------
A man is recovering from surgery when the surgical nurse appears and asks him how he is feeling.

"I'm OK but I didn't like the four letter-words the doctor used in surgery," he answered.

"What did he say?" asked the nurse.

"Oops!"
-----------------------------------
While shopping for vacation clothes, my husband and I passed a display of bathing suits. It had been at least ten years and twenty pounds since I had even considered buying a bathing suit, so I sought my husband's advice.

"What do you think?" I asked. "Should I get a bikini or an all-in-one?"

"Better get a bikini," he replied "You'd never get it all in one."

He's still in intensive care.
-----------------------------------
The graveside service just barely finished, when there was massive clap of thunder, followed by a tremendous bolt of lightning, accompanied by even more thunder rumbling in the distance.

The little old man looked at the preacher and calmly said, "Well, she's there."

Have a great Tuesday (and the rest of the week.)
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Sunday, May 17, 2009

The Accident

To my darling husband,

Before you return from your overseas trip I just want to let you know about the small accident I had with the pick up truck when I turned into the driveway.

Fortunately not too bad and I really didn't get hurt, so please don't worry too much about me. I was coming home from Wal-Mart, and when I turned into the driveway I accidentally pushed down on the accelerator instead of the brake.

The garage door is slightly bent but the pick up fortunately came to a halt when it bumped into your beloved Ferrari.

I am really sorry, but I know with your kind-hearted personality you will forgive me.

You know how much I love you and care for you my sweetheart.

I am enclosing a picture for you. I cannot wait to hold you in my arms again.

Your loving wife.
XXX

 

P.S. Your girlfriend called.

From my Ausie buddy, Scarlet, thanks!
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Wednesday, May 13, 2009

Armed Forces Day

 

I will be leaving for another dog transport on Thursday and I will not be back until late Saturday, so I want to take this time to remind you that Saturday, May 16th, is Armed Forces Day.

The day was created by President Harry S. Truman in 1949, as a result of the consolidation of the military services into the Department of Defense. The resolution was intended to have one day each year to celebrate those past and present in the service of their country and to replace the separate Army (June 14, 1775), Navy (Oct 13, 1775), Air Force (Sept 18, 1947), Marine Corps (Nov 10, 1775), and Coast Guard (Aug 4, 1790) Days. However, observance of these days continues within each of the particular services.

So in honor of this day, if you see a veteran, women give him some, men buy him a beer or coke or a cup of coffee or give him/her a slap on the back. Or just tell him/her thanks. You know which one I prefer.
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Tuesday, May 12, 2009

The First Celebrity To Go

The First Celebrity To Die Of The Swine Flu
 
And we all know who the carrier is.
Brought to you by my friend, Cindy.

**UPDATE
You know, I’ve been wondering what form of Swine Flu Kermit contacted. Miss Piggy is so much bigger than him and he is so small; I was wondering if he succumbed from some form of Swine Spelunking. Maybe he died from Swine Phew.

Monday, May 11, 2009

Wabbits

 

A little girl walks into a pet shop and asks, in the sweetest little lisp between two missing teeth, “Excuse me, mithter, do you keep widdle wabbits?”

As the shopkeeper’s heart melts, he gets down on his knees so that he’s on her level and asks, “Do you want a widdle white wabbit or a thoft and fuwwy bwack wabbt, or maybe one like that cute widdle bwown wabbit over there?”

She, in turn, blushes, rocks on her heels, puts her hands on her knees, leans forward and says in a tiny quiet voice, “I don’t think my python weally gives a thit.”
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Wednesday, May 06, 2009

The Navy Invented Sex

 

The Navy Invented Sex

A Marine and a sailor were sitting in a bar one day arguing over which was the superior service.

After a swig of beer the Marine says, 'Well, we had Iwo Jima.'

Arching his eyebrows, the sailor replies, 'We had the Battle of Midway.

'Not entirely true', responded the Marine. 'Some of those pilots were Marines, in fact, Henderson Field on Guadalcanal was named after a Marine pilot killed at the Battle of Midway.'

The sailor responds, 'Point taken.'

The Marine then says, 'We Marines were born at Tunn Tavern!'

The sailor, nodding agreement, says, 'But we had John Paul Jones.'

The argument continued until the sailor comes up with what he thinks will end the discussion. With a flourish of finality he says...... 'The Navy invented sex!'

The Marine replies, 'That is true, but it was the Marines who introduced it to women.'


Okay! Stop laughing! That cannot be true because when it came to sex the Marines never advnaced past their right hand.
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Tuesday, May 05, 2009

Go Marines and Mike

These Marine bumper stickers* are for Mike, America's 1st Sargent, who is over in the Sand Pit doing what is right.
 
Stay strong, 1st Sgt.
*Click on it to bigger size it - for those of you who are blind like me.

Bumper Stickers

How about a few bumper stickers today?
 
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