![](https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhD-ADWGNIC7dp6KzlXbSdxtOqnFepo9am7CXkmtEKC9Lru80LE1-DfVDW7L4Cesz6k7dm1FqabEAIPtFn8k7v1FobOlSKho6Lu4pHLGVt3Sd47rUzKv4LdPemuheXj102yaSzM/s400/Census_Bureau_Seal-298x300.jpg)
![](https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjTcbVs1LPHBaQmxerrrVCctkC6jmkn1fCBaYdfMfVl6ydCmZEtUYBWzUNXBM31wRKalb174IGMT4oJ4OslTTNrIe6_q75Qd-yf6RUet0WMu3xjPHe2G7X79nr8rokX2mk40BxM/s400/redneck-thanksgiving.jpg)
This is the year of the CENSUS. It is suppose to give, what use to be, the Government and is now OBAMANATION a clear picture of the country. But no Census would be correct if it didn't adjust to every section of the country. Here is the Redneck Census:
REDNECK CENSUS FORM
Last name: ________________
(Check appropriate box)
First name:
[_] Billy-Bob
[_] Bobby-Sue
[_] Billy-Joe
[_] Bobby-Jo
[_] Billy-Ray
[_] Bobby-Ann
[_] Billy-Sue
[_] Bobby-Lee
[_] Billy-Mae
[_] Bobby-Ellen
[_] Billy-Jack
[_] Bobby-Beth Ann Sue
Age: ____ (if unsure, guess)
Sex: ____ M _____ F _____ Not sure
Shoe Size: ____ Left ____ Right
Occupation:
[_] Farmer
[_] Mechanic
[_] Hair Dresser
[_] Waitress
[_] Un-employed
[_] Dirty Politician
Spouse's Name: __________________________
2nd Spouse's Name: __________________________
3rd Spouse's Name: __________________________
Lover's Name: __________________________
2nd Lover's Name: __________________________
Relationship with spouse:
[_] Sister
[_] Aunt
[_] Brother
[_] Uncle
[_] Mother
[_] Son
[_] Father
[_] Daughter
[_] Cousin
[_] Pet
Number of children living in household: ___
Number of children living in shed: ___
Number of children that are yours: ___
Mother's Name: _______________________
Father's Name: _______________________(If not sure, leave blank)
Education: 1 2 3 4 (Circle highest grade completed)
Do you [_] own or [_] rent your mobile home? (Check appropriate box)
Vehicles you own and where you keep them:
___ Total number of vehicles you own
___ Number of vehicles that still crank
___ Number of vehicles in front yard
___ Number of vehicles in back yard
___ Number of vehicles on cement blocks
Firearms you own and where you keep them:
____ truck
____ kitchen
____ bedroom
____ bathroom
____ shed
Model and year of your pickup: _____________ 194_
Number of road kills presently in your freezer?
[ ] 3
[ ] 5
[ ] 10 or more
Do you have a gun rack?
[_] Yes [_] No; If no, please explain:
Newspapers/magazines you subscribe to:
[_] The National Enquirer
[_] The Globe
[_] TV Guide
[_] Soap Opera Digest
[_] Rifle and Shotgun
___ Number of times you've seen a UFO
___ Number of times you've seen Elvis
___ Number of times you've seen Elvis in a UFO
How often do you bathe:
[_] Weekly
[_] Monthly
[_] Not Applicable
How many teeth? ___
Color of teeth:
[_] Yellow
[_] Brownish-Yellow
[_] Brown
[_] Black
[_] N/A
Brand of chewing tobacco you prefer:
[_] Red-Man
How far is your home from a paved road?
[_] 1 mile
[_] 2 miles
[_] don't know
8 comments:
You are a funny man! Glad I stumbled on your blog.
Oh Shiite!!! Just when I think I can settle down and get some sleep, you have to go post this and now I'm laughing every few seconds.
Thanks, Johhhhnnnn...
That is funny.
:( - No Bubba's?
Oh man, the color of the teeth!!!! This is really funny!
WannabeVirgin...uh...you know what I mean. Welcome and come back anytime - if you can stand it.
KyW, 'welcome! I think it would be fun keeping you awake.
Pax, Bubba is a nickname. It comes from you baby siblings not being able to say brother. Then the name sticks.
blueviolet, teeth color helps us recognize each other.
I saw that years ago. Only it was called 'Application For West Virginia Residency'. Funny either way.
Keep posting stuff like this i really like it
Post a Comment