"An extraordinarily handsome man (I know, I know, but it's not me this time) decided he had the responsibility to marry the perfect woman so they could produce beautiful children beyond compare.
With that as his mission he began to search for the perfect woman.
Shortly thereafter he met a Redneck who had three stunning, gorgeous daughters that positively took his breath away. So he explained his mission to the Redneck and asked for permission to marry one of them.
The Redneck simply replied, " They're lookin' to get married, so you came to the right place. Look 'em over and pick the one you want."
The man dated the first daughter. The next day the Redneck asked for the man's opinion.
"Well," said the man, "she's just a weeeeee bit, not that you can hardly notice ... pigeon-toed."
The Redneck nodded and suggested the man date one of the other girls; so the man went out with the second daughter.
The next day, the Redneck again asked how things went.
"Well, "the man replied, "she's just a weeeee bit, not that you can hardly tell … cross-eyed."
The Redneck nodded and suggested he date the third girl to see if things might be better. So he did.
The next morning the man rushed in exclaiming,
"She's perfect, just perfect. She's the one I want to marry."
So they were wed right away. Months later the baby was born. When the man visited the nursery he was horrified: the baby was the ugliest, most pathetic human you can imagine. He rushed to his father-in-law and asked how such a thing could happen considering the beauty of the parents.
"Well," explained the Redneck, "she was just a weeeee bit, not that you could hardly tell ... pregnant when you met her."