Sunday, September 11, 2011

I Don't Need A TV To Be Reminded

(The Wall For The 9/11 Victims)

I must really be a total asshole.  All this stuff on the television and radio about 9/11 has me bored to tears and pissed that I am missing some good television or talk radio…when I get to watch and listen.  Been real busy, yah know.

The reason I’m not watching is that I don’t need it.  Oh, there are some people who only live for themselves and need the reminder.  I don’t understand how anyone needs to be reminded of how much pride in country we had on 9/12 and a few months afterward.  I don’t understand why we don’t have it every day.

I don’t need any of this to remember.  I remember that and others almost every day.  On that morning I was home sick with the flu.  I survived, though there was no doubt I would lose my asshole by puking it up.  Anybarf,  I was watching  the Regis and Kelly morning show.  They had just called out the guest of the day when the station changed to the tower that had just been hit. 

I call my daughter, Marni, at work (Judy was in a meeting and didn't answer the call) and was talking to her when the second plane hit. I was riveted to the television and totally forgot about the puking.  I was in shock and then I was totally pissed.  I knew we had just been attacked.  It was our generation’s Pearl Harbor.  I knew we were going to be at war and I wanted to be part of it.

I had just been discharged for the second time fom a special hitch in the Navy.  I was able to go in under a reserve program where I would get credit for all my professional skills and experience.  I went in as a second class computer programmer (rate now abolished) and working in the NAS-Atlanta Intel Group (1st EURLANT) who analyzed aerial photos for the active duty troops.  But, due to a promotion and the amount of traveling I would have to do, I was given a Good Conduct Discharge.  When I went back on the 12th to get back in and on active duty, I was told that the requirements had changed and I was now too old.  The AF and Army said the same thing.  So I was out.

When the towers went down, I was freaking out and said out loud to no one, because I was alone, that there are people still in there.  The firemen, if no one else!  I was sitting there in tears, not from sadness (well not totally in sadness) but pissed.  I wanted someone to pay.

Now, I still do.  I remember those men and women in all three locations.  I do not know their names, nor do I know hardly any of the names of the 58,000 people on ‘The Wall.’  But I remember them, too.  And what all of them could have been.

I think of the guys who would have made great carpenters, electricians, truck drivers and construction workers.  Some would be in middle management or upper management in some company somewhere.  Others would be running their own business or in sales.  I wonder how many Oscar’s and Emmy’s would have been won if they had come home.  The ease of burdens on the families left behind or never formed.  All the contributions that could have been made to society. 

Yes! I remember them and all that could have been from the 9/11 victims, too.  What we lost in the taking of their lives.

I don’t need all this tear-jerking television stuff.  It is sad and depressing.  When I think of them, I feel a mixture of anger, pride, and respect.  No! I don’t need to watch a commercialized television show to remember.  I remember almost every day. 

Play Taps at the football games, and at race tracks.  Honor those who perished by talking about the good stuff.  The good memories!  For me, save the melancholy stuff for a cheap movies.   This total asshole doesn’t need it.

That’s all! Resume your normal daily activities.


Suz said...

I'm boycotting it myself. Guess I'm an asshole too.

Assholes unite!

AirmanMom said...

I don't consider us assholes...
I won't watch any of this 24 hour coverage either... my heart hurts when I remember that dark day. I don't need the media to tug at it and tell me how to feel.
My oldest son was 19 years old...serving his second year as an enlisted Airman. I was on a biz trip in Dallas, and all I needed that day was to hear my son's voice. We finally connected by phone and the first words out of his mouth, "I'm packed and ready to go, Momma."
The fear of that day, the patriotism in the days which followed, being stranded so far from home for days (I was on the first flight leaving DFW). I don't need TV to show images of that day over and over.
What I do desire is our Nation to come together once again, to see American Flags waving at every home, for all televised sports to hold a moment of silence and a few words of prayer (I do love Nascar)...
I fear September 12, 2011 will be nothing like September 12, 2001. This my friend is sad.

Anonymous said...

Well said, and thank you for saying it. I have been doing a lot of tongue biting the last couple of days.

Anonymous said...
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Pamela said...

I did some channel flipping and ended up on CNBC (first time I watched this station) and they concentrated on the reading of the names. Nothing else. No commercials! And it was a very touching program. No hype. Just loved ones of the deceased taking turns reading names. And before they released to the next set of readers, they got to announce their family member(s) who were lost - and some even had short messages. At the end of the readings (took hours, yes) the trumpets from the Port Authority, NYPD, NYFD, and US Military played the taps from opposite corners of the new memorial. I think you would have been able to stomach this one. I

The Reckmonster said...

I took the opportunity to teach my son about 9/11 this morning (he wasn't born yet when it happened). It was the first time I had ever sat down with him to talk about it and show him some of the footage from that awful day. He's just the right age to "get it" now...and the sad thing is, our country has been "at war" for the entire seven years of his life. I was not for flipping through the channels and listening to the propagandized bullshit the media was spewing out today either. But, I did catch part of the reading of the names that Pamela mentioned - and it was very powerful, indeed.

LOLA said...

I'm not watching it either so call me asshole. I think about the people in the towers all the time, and I pray for the people serving in the military and police officers and fire fighters and EMTs. I don't need TV programs trying to force me to wallow in grief so I'll watch even more TV. It's better to hold people in my heart. We don't do this on TV on Pearl Harbor Day, so I don't know why we're doing it now. It's just as important to remember Pearl Harbor as it is to observe 9/11. I bet most kids today have no idea what Pearl Harbor Day means. I think about it every Dec. 7th.


Rita said...

I learned upon my father's death that each of us grieve differently. Some find peace by sitting by the gravesite, some cannot visit there at all. I am somewhere in the middle.

I don't judge those who do not want to or cannot stomach watching the 9/11 coverage. My Vietnam Vet husband just walks out of the room when I need to watch.

I NEED that feeling. Of course I will never forget, but I feel the need to connect on this anniversary with others who feel it necessary to be reminded of that raw emotion.

I don't think that makes me an asshole anymore than it makes you an asshole who does not want to see it plastered on your TV screen.

I just need to grieve my loss of naivety on that day. And I express my grief differently than you do.

I take one day to wallow in my grief, to be incredibly angry and then tomorrow I go to work and live life as normal. That is how we win against the bastards that did this.

Ed said...

Amen, brother.

I didn't watch a lick of that shit today.

No need to remind myself of something I'll NEVER forget.

Yogi♪♪♪ said...

Amen to the Amen,

There hasn't been a day go by that I haven't thought about 9-11 and the people who died, and the people in the military and their families. So I don't need talking heads yammering about closure and healing. There is no closure is the big secret. Healing doesn't occur because of ceremonies.

Marnie said...

You make a lot of really good points. I viewed today like I do our rememberance day here in Canada - with respect and gratefulness for our freedom. I think 9/11 should always be remembered for being better to one another as life is precious. Great post.

dc said...

We all seem to be thinking alike. I am with you. I don't want to hear all the stuff from the news people. Reality was enough and we will carry it in our hearts everyday. We don't need to wallow in some of this stuff. We are going thru similar stuff here 3 mo. after the big tornado. It is still constantly in the news and so much "help" for the grieving "victims" We keep wanting to remember they are Victims! Just does't seem right to me.

Jamie said...

Great post. You are so right...

but you already knew that, didn't you?

Have a great week. :)