Thursday, February 23, 2012

$20 Dollars

On their wedding night, the young bride approached her new husband and asked for $20.00 for their first love making encounter. In his highly aroused state her husband readily agreed.

This scenario was repeated each time they made love, for more than 40 years, with him thinking that it was a cute way for her to afford new clothes and other incidentals that she needed.

Arriving home around noon one day, she was surprised to find her husband in a very drunken state.

During the next few minutes, he explained that his employer was going through a process of corporate downsizing, and he had been let go. It was unlikely that, at the age of 59, he'd be able to find another position that paid anywhere near what he'd been earning, and therefore, they were financially ruined.

Calmly, his wife handed him a bank book which showed more than forty years of steady deposits and interest totaling $1 million. Then she showed him certificates of deposits issued by the Bank which were worth over $2 million, and informed him that they were one of the largest depositors in the bank.

She explained that for more than three decades she had 'charged' him for sex.  These holdings had multiplied and these were the results of her savings and investments. 

Faced with evidence of cash and investments worth over $3 million, her husband was so astounded he could barely speak, but finally he found his voice and blurted out, If I'd had any idea what you were doing, I would have given you all my business!'

That's when she shot him.

You know, sometimes, men just don't know when to keep their mouths shut

Women are like phones: They like to be held, talked to, and touched often.
But push the wrong button and your ass is disconnected


dc said...

Good one. I really like the last part!

Janie Junebug said...

Very wise, my sweet Coffey.


The Reckmonster said...

Note to self: start charging future husbands $40 per "encounter"...

AirmanMom said...

drats...I wonder what the rate is for 'women my age'?
Thanks fof the chuckle!

Yogi♪♪♪ said...

That's an oldie but I still fall for it every time.

Not So Simply Single said...

okay, you are crazy...for sure!

Hey, that word verification is really hard now to do.... do you really need it?

Beau's Mom said...

DAMMIT. All these years.....what an idiot I am. On the other hand, being married to my first husband for 30 years, I would only have had enough money for a piece of string. A waste on all counts.

Beau's Mom said...

Uh....your word verification means ALL your readers have to have good eyesight too. Not very wise of you...considering...