Thursday, June 21, 2012

They Walk Among Us...





























They Walk Among Us!

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Some guy bought a new fridge for his house. To get rid of his old ridge, he put it in his front yard and hung a sign on it saying, “Free To A Good Home. If You Want It , Take It.”

For three days the fridge sat there without anyone looking twice.

He eventually decided that people were too mistrustful of this deal so he changed the sign to read, “Fridge For Sale - $50.”

The next day someone stole it.

They Walk Among Us!

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I stopped at McDonald’s and ordered some fries. The girl behind the counter asked, “Would you like some fries with that?”

They Walk Among Us!

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One day I was walking down the beach with some friends when someone shouted, “Look at that dead bird!”

Someone else looked up at the sky and said, “Where?”

They Walk Among Us!

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While looking at a house, my brother asked the real estate agent which direction was North because he didn’t want the sun waking him up every morning.

She asked, “Does the sun rise in the North?”

My brother explained that the sun rises in the East and has for some time.

She shook her head and said, “Oh, I don’t keep up with all that stuff.”

They Walk Among Us!

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My colleague and I were eating lunch in our cafeteria when we overheard an admin girl talking about the sunburn she got on her weekend drive to the beach.

She drove down in a convertible, but said she, “…didn’t think she’d get sunburned because the car was moving.”

They Walk Among Us!

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My sister has a lifesaving tool in her car which is designed to cut through a seatbelt if she gets trapped. She keeps it in the car trunk.

They Walk Among Us!

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I was going out with a friend when we saw a woman with a nose ring attached to an earring by a chain.

My friend said, “Ouch! The chain must rip out every time she turns her head.”

I had to explain that a person’s nose and ear remain the same distance apart no matter which way the head is turned.

They Walk Among Us!

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I couldn’t find my luggage at the airport baggage area an dwent to the lost luggage office and reported the loss.

The woman there smiled and told me not to worry because she was a trained professional and said I was in good hands. ‘Now,’ she asked me, ‘Has your pane arrived yet?”

They Walk Among Us!

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While working a a pizza parlor I observed a man ordering a small pizza to go. He appeared to be alone and the cook asked him I fhe would like it cut into 4 or 6 pieces. He thought about it and said, “Just 4 pieces; I don’t think I could eat 6 pieces.”

They Walk Among Us!

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And They Breed!



10 comments:

Kristy said...

Very funny!

Pamela said...

that pizza one reminds me of a math class I took as an adult (prerequisite for something I thought I wanted to do)
Anyway the teacher asked a question on what was a better deal for your money on two pizzas. It was obvious to me that you figure how big your pizza is (area = pi* r2) and then you can figure the cost per inch. But the teacher chose the one with the more slices. As if you couldn't slice a pizza any way you wanted. I just thought -- he never fed a family

Symdaddy said...

Mathematics!

We don't teach kids the right way!
Half of all parents think it should taught on a daily basis, half think it should be taught only once per week. But the other two thirds think we should drop mathematics from the syllabus all together.

blueeyedtawni said...

hehheheheeheehehe

Coffeypot said...

Symdaddy, now that is funny!

dc said...

Now I have to admit I had to think about the nose/ear ring thing. Sort of turned my head from side to side a couple times. Ya know I bleached my hair blonde way to many years!

Coffeypot said...

dc, not now put the piercings and chain on to see if you get the same results.

lotta joy said...

And because they walk among us, Obama doesn't have anything to fear.

Coffeypot said...

That scares me even more, LJ.

Janie Junebug said...

Jesus H.

Love,
Janie