Saturday, February 09, 2013

One Of These Days...

(This is our house. We live in the basement seen under the porch)

One of these days…
One of these days…
One of these days Judy and I are going to start a project around the house and have it go smoothly…without any errors, brakeage, spillage, loss of blood or getting stuck.

For example, this summer, if you remember, we bought, put together, and started to fill an above ground pool on the hottest day of the year.  Over 102 degrees (that’s 40 degrees Celsius for you folks who figure things like that the wrong way) and so humid that we stayed soaked in sweat - only to find the ground wasn’t as level as it seemed at the time.  We had to drain the pool, dismantle it and dig out an area to make it level.  Fun times!

There have been times where we have started building a shed or patio only to find out we didn’t have enough wood that was on sale and now out of stock at Home Depot.  Not enough nails or wood screws.  A gallon of paint shy of a full painted wall.  Things like that.  If it can be fucked up from the get-go, just call on us.  We can make it happen.

So, today, we ordered a dump truck load of sand and gravel to make a drive way and car park outside our entrance.  With all the rain washing away the topsoil where we park and drive to around the house, and with my truck getting stuck and plowing up a couple of rows during a storm, we agreed we needed it.  So we ordered a load.

We have a long driveway from the road of about 80 yards on the left side of the house.  Then we drive behind the house to get to the right side where the door to the basement is located.  Also, we live on a hill!  A week of soaking rain!  Judy and I deciding to do a project!  All the ingredients needed for a good fuck-up!

The dump truck was late. It was supposed to be there just after noon, but had another job to do first.  He got suck out in a horse field and had to wait for someone to help pull him out.   So he showed up around 4:15.  We decided that he should pull off the driveway and cross in front of the house so that he would be facing in the right direction and location to start spreading the sand and rocks.

(Not our front yard, but scene looked like this.)

As I said, we live on a hill.  When he made the turn into the front yard the 17 ton load shifted and the left rear wheels came up a little, just enough that they couldn’t get traction and was plowing a rut.  The dump truck didn’t have a locked differential so the right wheels were not a driving set.  So, after walking around the truck, scratching our heads, and the drive smoking one cigarette after the other, we decided we needed a tow truck to help him out.  We called the hauling company and they sent out a wrecker… one of those big jobs that could pull up the Titanic.  We sent him around a different way and he backed up to the dump truck, attached a cable and pulled him to a more downhill slope before unhooking.

Everything went smoothly after that.  He poured a double car park and a driveway from there around the back of the house up to the driveway.  We had a few good laughs and swapped truck driving, getting stuck stories (I drove route trucks and semi’s for Coca Cola and a beer company for 20 years) and then he was on his way…breaking the fence-less electric wire we use to keep my son-in-law’s dogs on the property.

The good news is, we have a drive way and parking spot that we want slide or get stuck during the rainy season.  Even better news, no blood was lost, muscles pulled, or bruises suffered this time.  Just a loss of good daylight while waiting!

Maybe our luck is changing...

NAH! I doubt it.


Kristy said...

Glad you got your driveway. I hear you on projects all of ours goes wrong some way or another also. Nothing is simple.

Linda said...

Did you know that the gravel might wash away? I have a backyard full of gravel that was poured in the driveway in the front yard. Or, maybe you have done something to stop the gravel from washing away?

That must have been exciting seeing the dump truck tip.

Well Seasoned Fool said...

Sounds like you are on good terms with Murphy.

Janie Junebug said...

Well, congratulations, I guess. I hope your gravel stays put.


Old NFO said...

Oh man... THAT could have gone wrong in SO many ways... LOL Maybe the luck IS changing!

lotta joy said...

What is rain? What does a hill look like? I forget.

And if all of this was accomplished with no blood loss, muscles pulled, or bruises, it's because you had outsiders helping.

Coffeypot said...

Kristy, at least it's not around here.

Linda, we outlined the driveway and parking area with landscaping timbers spiked into the ground. Hopefully that will work.

WSF, sometimes I think Murphy copied my book.

Janie, the gravel is mixed in with sand and I was told it would set up like concrete. We will see.

Old NFO, I first I thought the dump truck was going to go over. I guess that's when my luck started to change and it didn't.

LJ, all he did was spread it, we had to do all the trim work and shifting of some of the area. I don't see how anyone who lived in the green of woods and hills and mountains and seasons could ever live in FLA. But we all do what ever it takes I guess.

Shana said...

Stories like those make great blog fodder!!

lotta joy said...

Coffey: Who said I'm "living" in Florida. Not only is it god's waiting room, all I have to do is look around to realize I've been screwed by Stud's desire to move here. And not in the good way.

That Janie Girl said...

At least no one was hurt.

AND you now have a driveway.

Rainy Weather?

Isn't that a song? I've NEVER seen any of that stuff.

middle child said...

I like how you said the fence-less electric wire was to keep the son-in-law's DOGS in the yard. None of us are fooled. We know it is to keep you from wandering away.

Mystic Mud said...

So happy for you that you got some gravel - we want some here too in the worst way....the mud gets old.

I remember the swimming pool story - that was my "gateway post" into your world....I thought it was so funny and you just cussed and cussed, if I remember right. It sounds like the gravel went better than the pool:)

Momma Fargo said...

I'm glad no animals were hurt in that production. Looked like a muddy area. Glad you got a driveway!