Bird Feeders and A House

Judy and I have taken to watching birds.  To this end, we put up two feeders.  

(click on the pics to make them bigger for those of us who can't see shit)

The one on the left feeds Cardinals, Titmouse, Tits (mostly Blue Tit), Cowbirds and some I haven’t recognized yet. 

The other on the right is a Hummingbird Feeder.  I really enjoy watching these little fuckers.  They hover, back up in flight, and are mean spirited.  They do not share with other humming birds that are not in their family.  They fight and chase each other off.  And they are so small, and sometimes they look like those huge back bees that fly all over the place in the spring.

The same thing happens with the Cardinals.  Most birds share the food house or swinging bowl, but when the Cardinal shows up (usually in pairs – one will stand watch on the fence while the other eats) and all the other birds fly off.  The only bird that will make the Cardinal fly off is the Cowbird.  Or when a human opens the door or says anything.  They fly off, then, too.

However, we are looking for one that will work for us.  Living in the country with all the chickens, horses and cows, there is a little pest that will drive you nuts.  Flies!  So we did our due-diligence in solving the problem… we called Dr. Amber (my step-daughter the vet).  The best thing for fly control without using sprays, fly swats, deals with the devil and animal sacrifice, was to set up a home for Purple Martins.  Their main food supply is flies.

So we bought, assembled, and put up the Purple Martin Home For Hungry Birds out in the front field/yard.  See it in the background in the first picture?

Getting that thing on a pole 15’ high was a project in itself. 

This is the time of year they are migrating back in the area, but they are also a bird of habit and will go to their previous dwellings.  So the only chance we had is if some PMHs were removed during the year.   Well, five days after putting up the home, there was one sitting on the roof. 

Judy and I were working in the yard and I looked up and there it was.  But it flew off.  And didn’t come back!  CALL AMBERRRR!

It seems that they send out scouts on their way back to make sure things are as they left them (we have to be meticulous landlords, it seems).  And if not, the scout goes and finds a place.  If he/she is satisfied with it, it will fly back to the flock and vector them in.  This can take up to two weeks.

And this got me to thinking (I know, shut it).  How far in advance will he scout.  Where are the rest while he is scouting?  Are they flying home or waiting at a Bird Waffle House or what?  How does he find them and how does he tell them to follow him?  Is there a Purple Martin Real Estate Office off in the woods somewhere?

When he finds them, what does he say in bird talk?  “Hey honey (or Master or Sire or whoever he reports to) I found a great place that meets all our needs.  It’s fifteen feet off the ground, twenty yards from any trees, two stories high with 12 connecting rooms but has never been lived in.  We can set it up to our liking without having to worry about others messes.  And it’s only a week’s flying time away.  Let’s gooooo!  Up, Up, and AWAAYYYY”

Ma Nature is awesome if you think about what all the critters do and what they go through.  And remember, all those pretty bird calls, creature sounds coming from the woods and bushes and places are just males trying to get laid.

So we will be watching to see if a family sets up homestead.   

AND EATS OUR DAMN FLIES!

 

Ant Dome Update

Here’s an update on the Ant Dome.  

Well, after carefully watching and thinking about it, I finally realized what it is I am looking at.  This area is the China Beach of Aintdom, - their beach and water park!  A spa for work and war weary Army Ants and worker ants.

See the beach area and the stick they use for sliding down into the water… or maybe for some diving.  Who knows what ants like to do at a water park?

Evidently the area below the water park is where the spa and living areas are located.  I’m not sure what the rates are per night, a Chigger per guest or something, but I know they spend a lot of time down there.  I imagine there has to be some good game rooms and party areas because they don’t come to the park much.  Maybe a casino!  Who knows?

They aren’t there today because it is kinda cool out and the wind has some pretty good gust.  So I suspect it is not ant swimming weather.   And it’s cloud, too.  Not good for tanning.  Besides, what would happen if one of those little black ants got sunburned and was red.  Talk about ‘there goes he neighborhood.’  It might not be wise to get too much sun.

Anywatch, I’ll check in with them when it gets hotter outside.  Might catch some of them nude bathing.  Keep your fingers crossed.

Till then, later, Peeps.

How Planes Fly

I don’t think it’s that hard to learn to fly.

I already have most of it figured out.

All I have to do now is figure out where the transmission and the clutch is and I'm ready to go.

I think I’ll drive out to the airport and pick up a pilot’s license this afternoon.

Come fly with me…

SIMPLE HOME REMEDIES

AMAZINGLY SIMPLE HOME REMEDIES THAT REALLY WORK:

1.   AVOID CUTTING YOURSELF WHEN SLICING VEGETABLES BY GETTING SOMEONE ELSE TO HOLD THE VEGETABLES WHILE YOU CHOP.

2.  AVOID ARGUMENTS WITH THE FEMALES ABOUT LIFTING THE TOILET SEAT BY USING THE SINK.

3.  FOR HIGH BLOOD PRESSURE SUFFERERS ~ SIMPLY CUT YOURSELF AND BLEED FOR A FEW MINUTES, THUS REDUCING THE PRESSURE ON YOUR VEINS.  REMEMBER TO SET A TIMER.

4.  A MOUSE TRAP PLACED ON TOP OF YOUR ALARM CLOCK WILL PREVENT YOU FROM ROLLING OVER AND GOING BACK TO SLEEP AFTER YOU HIT THE SNOOZE BUTTON.

5.  IF YOU HAVE A BAD COUGH, TAKE A LARGE DOSE OF LAXATIVES; THEN YOU'LL BE AFRAID TO COUGH.

6.  YOU NEED ONLY TWO TOOLS IN LIFE - WD-40 AND DUCT TAPE. 

IF IT DOESN'T MOVE AND SHOULD, USE THE WD-40. 

IF IT SHOULDN’T MOVE AND DOES, USE THE DUCT TAPE.

7.  IF YOU CAN’T FIX IT WITH A HAMMER, YOU'VE GOT AN ELECTRICAL PROBLEM. 

Birth Of An A 10