Sunday, June 29, 2008

What's Your Color?

This will be a long post, but it will be a fun one - I hope. First of all, I will be going to Greensboro for J-Man's surgery and will be there all next week without a computer. I might stroke out, but being with him is just too important for me to worry about a blog.

So, for the fun! Choose your favorite color from RED, YELLOW, PINK, PURPLE, BLACK, GREEN, ORANGE, BROWN, GRAY, BLUE, or WHITE. Don't cheat now. Just pick your favorite color first and then look at the definitions below to find out about your sexuality. Also, leave me a comment to let me know what your color is, too. Mine is BLUE. Enjoy and I'll check in next weekend.

The clothes you wear, your home furnishings and the car you drive all give clues to your sexual personality. The key is the colors you select for your possessions. Most people claim they haven't a favorite color. But look around you, and you'll notice a pattern, especially in your clothing and home decor. The predominant color for you is the one that appears most frequently -- it's the one that mirrors the sexual you. A panel of psychologists, speaking at the 1975 Home Interior Design Forum, explained the association between color and sexual patterns.

RED: People who like red tend to be tigers in the sack. They are easily aroused and enjoy sex in every way imaginable. Once the sexual spark is ignited, it may take hours to extinguish. When two reds get together, the ensuing erotica could make Lady Chatterley blush. Lovers of red tend to be aggressors and weaker colors should be aware.

YELLOW: If you tend to favor yellow, your sexual drives are complex and turn toward the adaptable. In most cases the person will consent to the stronger partner's desires in a passive manner. You will never enjoy sex to the fullest, but you will never turn down an invitation from somebody you enjoy or admire.

PINK: Persons who like pink show a reluctance to mature in sexual matters: women tend to tease, to promise more than they intend to deliver. In some cases they flaunt their femininity -- but because they secretly hate men. A great percentage of prostitutes boast entire wardrobes in pink. Men who like pink are the philanderers and flirts. They are the type who will make three dates for the same evening and not keep one, preferring to pick up a dish in some bar instead. Women whose husbands like pink should keep a secret nest egg.

PURPLE: Lovers of purple frequently consider themselves to be too sophisticated for a fun romp in the sack. Women sometimes are the types who hate to mess their hair. Men are business-like in their approach to lovemaking. In both sexes purple partners are more concerned with their fulfillment than anyone else's gratification.

BLACK: Black color preferences point to black sex (not necessarily meaning black partners). These people are the misfits of the sex world and seek out each other in kinship. They tend to prefer perverted sex and are usually masochistic or sadistic in nature. They are moody people and often perform at their peak when under stress or during unhappy times. Police psychiatrists claim that sex offenders prefer the color black. And it is no coincidence that the uniform of mobsters and teenage gangs is black attire.

GREEN: Those who prefer green are fresh and innocent in their approach to sex. Women who love green will always make love like virgins all their life. And a man may always be a trifle clumsy and awkward but in a charming and endearing sort of way. Green lovers are gentle, but not passionate. If chosen as a mate, one will never need worry about infidelity.

ORANGE: Lovers of the color orange lean toward sexual fantasies. The sex act is regarded as a dramatic one-act play in which they are the star. Foreplay is as important as the act of love. They whisper sweet nothings, meaningless dialogue; they feel it is their image. Orange people often do not experience orgasm -- but they put on a darn good act. Men tend to pull their partner's hair and women leave red welts on the sex partner's back.

BROWN: If you love brown, you're a real treasure for the right mate. Brown lovers tend to be warm and deep, sensitive to the needs and desires of their partners. Sex is a 24 hour a day thing. Where you can't say "I love you" often enough. Snuggling by the fire, walking in the rain or catching snowflakes on their tongue is a turn-on to a lover of brown. They need lots of time and privacy to make love. But their emotions are such that one harsh word could end the affair.

GRAY: The color gray is preferred by people who are indecisive. They can't get excited about anything -- including color -- so they choose a noncommittal shade. Men who prefer gray look at sex as a way of relieving tension -- but nothing more, nothing less. It's wham, bam, thank you ma'am. Women don't make love, they have intercourse. And for one of two reasons only: to accommodate their mate, or to become pregnant. They count the cracks in the bedroom plaster until the sex act is over with and done. But when teamed with another color, the gray spouse considers the other's infidelity a blessing. When a gray marries another gray, the marriage is made in heaven.

BLUE: Lovers of blue are wonderful sex partners. They are affectionate and sensitive to their partner's needs. They consider love making a fine art and their approach is elegant. Men who love blue are like concert pianists, delicately ravaging their partner like they would play a baby grand. Women in the blue category enjoy sex to the fullest. They are exciting partners but their passion may be compared to a tidal wave rather than fiery aggression. Both women and men enjoy foreplay and the aftermath of lovemaking, as much as the sex acts itself. In marriage a blue person is a wonderful mate -- never seeking outside interests.

WHITE: If a person is infatuated with white, sex often seems filthy. These people are puritanical in nature. French kissing is obscene and to make love in the daylight is unheard of. Women who love white will undress beneath the covers. Men will shower before and after the sex act. These people still use pet names for their genitals.

13 comments:

Burfica said...

I'm blue and hubby is red. lol

"that girl" said...

confused, confused

i have lots of black stuff and when choosing clothes i migrate towards black but in the house i go with more wine colors, deep red, purple

and i see me fitting into all three of those categories

hhhhmmmmmm

Cup said...

I am full-on BLUE.

Olly said...

Wait just a minute!!! I'm black only because we have a black cat and it's easier to have clothes/furniture that roque cat hair is not so visible on. Really, I'm not some kind of pervert. Ya...that's the ticket!

e.Craig Crawford said...

Well that was total bullshit for me. Simply not true. Next time I'm choosing chartreuse.

Brother Dave said...

w0w…I absolutely love all those colors equally. I think I'm in trouble.

Anonymous said...

i am blue and hubby is brown.
give J man a hug from me, will be thinking about you all

Real Live Lesbian said...

Orange! It says: women leave red welts on the sex partner's back.

Ahem, I wouldn't know ANYTHING about THAT!

Southern (in)Sanity said...

Well, since black is my favorite color - and I am not changing favorite colors - I guess that means I need to get a bit dirtier/freakier/perverted with my sex life.

Teri said...

what happens if you're in between colors? I can't decide.

Jan said...

Ut oh. My favorite color is red. Oh geeze! No comment. :)

Unknown said...

What's my color? Madris! Go figure... I never know if I'm coming or going... Glad to hear that grandson J-man is on the road to recovery. He made a wise decisionto undergo the corrective surgery while he is young and his body is strong. I go in for my heart procedure on this coming Tuesday. Hopefully, it wil lbe nothnig more than a look around and then home for supper. Hopfully, I'll bounce back quickly and be able to give a good report.

Special K said...

I object

this is biased.

Most men will pick blue...and most men are NOT what blue says.

I, therefore, object

and I still owe you a butt kicking.

Just sayin

hee hee hee he

Hope you're havin a Happy 4th, sweets!! xoxox