Jeff Foxworthy on Muslims

1. If you refine heroin for a living, but you have a moral objection to liquor.
You may be a Muslim

2. If you own a $3,000 machine gun and $5,000 rocket launcher, but you can't afford shoes.
You may be a Muslim

3. If you have more wives than teeth.
You may be a Muslim

4. If you wipe your butt with your bare hand, but consider bacon unclean.
You may be a Muslim

5. If you think vests come in two styles: bullet-proof and suicide.
You may be a Muslim

6. If you can't think of anyone you haven't declared Jihad against.
You may be a Muslim

7. If you consider television dangerous, but routinely carry explosives in your clothing.
You may be a Muslim

8. If you were amazed to discover that cell phones have uses other than setting off roadside bombs.
You may be a Muslim

9. If you have nothing against women and think every man should own at least four.
You may be a Muslim

10. If your cousin is president of the United States .
You may be a Muslim

11. You find this offensive or racist and don't forward it,

You may be a Muslim

Redneck 12 Days of Christmas by Jeff Foxworthy

YouTube had this one blocked, so you will have to either click below or copy and paste.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VJOe3CXE-mA

But you need to see how rednecks celebrate Christmas.

The Best To All On This Day Of Celebrating Christ Birth.

Happiness, health and smooth sailing for all y'all.

Jeff Foxworthy on Muslims

If you refine heroin for a living, but you have a moral objection to liquor.
You may be a Muslim

If you own a $3,000 machine gun and $5,000 rocket launcher, but you can't afford shoes.
You may be a Muslim

If you have more wives than teeth.
You may be a Muslim

If you wipe your butt with your bare hand, but consider bacon unclean.
You may be a Muslim

If you think vests come in two styles: bullet-proof and suicide.
You may be a Muslim

If you consider television dangerous but routinely carry explosives in your clothing.
You may be a Muslim

If you were amazed to discover that cell phones have uses other than setting off roadside bombs.
You may be a Muslim

If you have nothing against women and think every man should own at least four.
You may be a Muslim

If you find this offensive or racist and don't forward it.
YOU may be a Muslim